Playing Hard To Get- The Pros And Cons? Babes and guys, what's your take on playing hard to get?

       
Playing hard to get applies mostly to ladies/girls who wouldn't want to appear cheap to their toasters and as such give their toasters much stress. They do that with the notion that when a woman plays hard to get even when in her heart she really desires the man, that if she eventually agrees that the man would cherish and value her so much. 
They believe guys toil with the heart of babes that play easy to get, calling them "cheap". read more after the cut.....................

A man can also play hard to get if it is a woman that is toasting him, especially if he doesn't find the lady attractive.

Is it worth then to play hard to get or easy to get? And in what circumstances are each of these seemingly contradictory tactics-"playing hard to get"and "playing easy to get"-more effective? 

The first tactic is most effective when used in the context of long-term love or the marital context in which a person wishes to be sure of their partner's fidelity. Long-term romantic love may have significant and enduring benefits for us and hence we are ready to invest a lot of effort, and other resources, in order to attain it. Playing hard to get ensures that the other person is ready to make a commitment to an enduring relationship. 

The tactic of "playing easy to get" is most effective when used by someone in the context of casual sex, where availability is the most important commodity. In this context, people are not ready to make significant investments since the benefits are smaller and more temporary; hence, playing hard to get here will not be effective at all.

Both tactics are less effective when used by men. The more overt the intimate advances by men, the less attractive women find them-probably because women do not want men to consider them as highly promiscuous. 
Playing hard to get is also less effective in men, as they are the ones who are socially expected to initiate the relationship.
Romantic love is often described as a game, but love is more than just a game for two. Love is a very profound and complex experience involving serious, yet enjoyable games that two can play and both win.
But at the end of the day, we must realize the serious nature of this enjoyable bond between two people, and act accordingly. Acting seriously should not mean the abolishment of games in love, but rather making them more important.

Whatever is easily available is not considered valuable but when something is scarce, it assumes preciousness. This is the law of economics. However, when applied to human relationships, it throws up varied results. Many people like to think that if they play hard to get with someone they like, they have higher chances of attracting them. But does it really work?

Dangers Of Playing Hard To Get

In a book, they write: "Playing hard to get is the easiest way to land Mr. Wrong (i.e., Mr. Avoidant.)"Ah ha!

So, I was like, why is playing hard to get a bad idea in the long run, even though it might seem like a good strategy in the short-term (because it might help you win over a very successful or attractive guy)?

They wrote:"Playing hard to get is bad news, period — both in the short run and in the long run. People need to understand that when they go out on a date, they're not looking to win anyone over. They're out to find out whether this person is right for them, whether he has the capacity to make them happy. If you play hard to get, or in fact, if you play games at all, it will be very hard to tell if this person is a good match for you and if he is able to meet your needs. If you’re not putting your personality and needs out there, how will you know how the other person reacts to them, and whether he can show up and be there for you?

The danger when you're playing hard to get is that you will 'win over' someone who actually doesn’t feel comfortable being close and prefers to play hot and cold. You've led him to believe that you're comfortable with this kind of arrangement and when you decide it's time to let up the 'act,' you discover that you and your partner aren't in sync, and that he isn't capable of giving you what you need."

Some claim that one may lose her Mr Right by playing too hard to get as some guys don't really like being tossed around.


Finally, I think babes should strike a balance between playing hard to get and playing easy to get.

Babes and guys, what's your take on playing hard to get?